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Someday (the proposal post)


I must have started this blog twenty times already, trying to figure out how best to tell the story. I finally realized that I can just focus on one piece of the story here and then tell the rest in future posts. That helped me to unlock.


If you'd told me even a couple of years ago that things would unfold as they have, I would have thought you were joking.


And yet, here we are.


The moments that inspired my recent proposal to Sofie have lived in my head for years. She and I met back in 2003 and there is certainly a lot more to tell about what took place beginning that year. For now, suffice it to say that she and I were able to stay in touch despite the long distance and the (at that time) lack of social media & WiFi-enabled apps that would have made things so much easier.


In 2006, I made my first visit to Utrecht to see Sofie. Of the many memorable moments that I'll detail in future posts, the one most applicable here is the moment after we'd gone out to eat in a restaurant and were walking back to her apartment. I took her hands and we started dancing. This was the middle of March, so it was still really cold outside; nonetheless, I started singing to her and ... just for a few moments ... it felt like time stopped.


At this point, I wish I could write that I dropped down on one knee right then and asked her to spend the rest of her life with me. I sincerely wish I had. But I didn't. Instead, I left a few days later, we continued to be in touch, occasionally seeing each other in New York over the next few years and then we lost touch.


I never stopped thinking of her, though, and by March 2019 ... thirteen years after our date that night ... I felt that I had to reach out to her and let her know. So, I did. I sent her an email to tell her how much she meant to me and how I treasure the memories of our time together. Before I knew it, we started communicating and (once again, lots more to tell here) after many conversations, emails and eventually in-person visits, I've now moved from Brooklyn to Utrecht to be with her and her two small children.


So, one night back in October, I told Sofie I was going to have dinner with her mom while she spent time with one of her closest friends. That friend was, of course, my accomplice in the plan and we managed to get Sofie to the exact spot where, back in 2006, we'd had our dance. As you see in the photos, I hired a saxophonist to accompany me and a videographer to capture the moment. I sang to her just as I did that night in 2006 ... and then I did what I should have done all those years ago. She said "yes" and we expect to be married at some point in 2021.


Thank you for taking the time to read this and for being part of our lives. I will blog as often as I can in the coming weeks and months. To see more of our lives together, I invite you to follow my new YouTube channel: Stepdad in a Foreign Land.


We are sending lots of love to you all and hope that you'll be in touch through comments here and/or on YouTube, WhatsApp messages, emails, phone calls, snail mail ... we welcome it all.

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